#1 What is your illness Wayne?
- wjones834
- Feb 22, 2024
- 3 min read
Updated: Feb 23, 2024
ANCA Vasculitis - yep ! Trust me to be that 1 in a million where the thing hits every part!
It is the reason I felt I was no longer worthy of calling myself a father and husband
It is the reason I felt I could no longer provide for my family
It is the reason I can no longer play rugby
It is the reason I can no longer go to the gym 5 days a week
It is the reason I can't go for a quiet pint with my mates
It is the reason I am jobless, the first time since the age of 12
It is the reason my Wife found me naked with blood everywhere after a heart attack
It is the reason my Daughter saw her Daddy fighting for his life by the side of the road
It is the reason I can no longer walk up the stairs without getting out of breath
It is the reason my wife and daughter have seen me wake up in a bloodbath
It is the reason they hear me daily coughing up chunks of flesh
It is the reason my nose bled for 12 months
It is the reason my nose has since collapsed
It is the reason behind me losing one third of my vocal chords
It is the reason why we have had to cancel holidays and concerts
It is the reason Daddy can't take his little girl to the cinema
It is the reason why bright lights, loud noise and heat make me unwell
It is the reason I'm often found lying on a cold slate floor with a frozen face mask
It is the reason I have tinnitus and a 24/7 pulsating squeal and thud in both ears
It is the reason I have lost the peripheral vision in my left eye
It is the reason I can have insomnia for 6 consecutive nights or sleep for 3 days solid
It is the reason I have missed celebrations and days for loved ones
It is the reason I have to carry medical supplies and spare t shirts due the flushes and sweats
It is the reason the hair on my arms and legs has fallen out
It is the reason I am a prisoner in my own home as I'm unable to drive
It is the reason I am distanced from loved ones as I'm unable to look at screens for too long
It is the reason I cant speak to them on the phone as I have bad ears and no voice at times
It is the reason my confidence in how I look is at its worst
It is the reason I now feel like I have anxiety
It is the reason I suffer panic attacks
It is the reason I am so mentally and physically exhausted
It is the reason my hands and feet are always cold yet sweaty
It is the reason I have no money as I was too proud to claim benefits and used all my savings
It is the reason I was seconds away from giving up - it can take you that quickly!
BUT !!!!!
It is the reason I have a purpose! A purpose bigger than any of my symptoms, any of my pity parties, any of my ego or confidence issues.
Something that see's me provide for more than my family!
I am spearheading a charity to raise awareness of this thing and the mental impact.!!!
It is the reason I have already made a difference to peoples lives.
It is the reason I have turned them little nervous butterflies into a fire breathing dragon!
And yes I am quoting Scott Quinell.
Stand with me Shoulder - Shoulder and lets make a difference.
Your stronger as a team. Every Saturday I used to take the field as a spartan with what felt like 300 men behind him, in rugby we're a brotherhood. One in All in.
Well - that is also there after those 80 minutes, IF YOU ASK FOR IT !
I’ve had to read this in about 4 parts because I couldn’t see through the tears.
You have been very brave and open exposing yourself in this way and we are all so proud of you.
Keep being the fighter you have proven to yourself that you are ❤️❤️
To be so open to the 🌎 to help others showing how what you and your girls are coping with takes courage. So proud of you all ❤️
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To be so open and ready to share the good, the bad & the ugly has got to be one of the bravest and selfless things I've ever seen. So proud of you ♥️